One of the central elements of any functional family relationship is respect. I have noticed a common characteristic in most troubled relationships is the break down and loss of respect between those involved.
In marriages one or both no longer listen to and value the others opinions and ideas. They say and do hurtful things to each other. In extreme cases there is physical and emotional abuse. Such actions add to the distance between them and this can lead to a break down in trust. If you feel your spouse does not respect you and their actions are not seeking to do what is best for both of you then you do not trust their decisions.  In time anger and resentment builds and the tension increases leading to arguments and breaking down respect and trust even more. Until both of you realize this downward cycle and take steps to break out of it the relationship will continue to get worse and eventually it will fall apart. Between parents and children a similar pattern can develop. This disrespect can take many forms. Parents who do not treat their children with respect can go to either extreme. They can be overly harsh and even abusive in their discipline, either of which leads to the child loosing respect for the parent. On the other extreme the overly involved, overly protective parent does not respect the child?s abilities and strengths making the child feel disrespected.Children who do not feel respected and valued do not show their parents respect back. They do not listen, they argue and disobey.  The children do not learn how to make decisions, how to express themselves, how to be responsible, etc.  This starts at a young age and by the time they are teenagers they are often completely out of control.