Home birth, it is a loaded idea in our birth culture for sure. Just Google or You Tube it sometime. You'll find everything from "That family is selfish and putting their baby into danger" to "The mot perfect way to give birth." While I believe this is a choice best made by each family individually. Home births are as safe if not safer than hospital births and should at least be considered as an option for healthy, low-risk women.  

Ashley, the laboring woman in the above photo, was no exception to the wide variety of comments she received while she was planning her home water birth of their second baby. She herself worked through the spectrum on a personal level. In fact when I met her she let me know that she was planing a hospital birth with a CNM and an epidural. She had even talked personally with an anesthesiologist concerning her epidural. It was the issue of paying out of pocket and her previous birth experience that led her to look at other options. One of which included a doula and taking hypno birthing classes. After chatting on the phone over a few weeks and really working out what it was that she needed and wanted she came to the conclusion that she was ready to look into the natural childbirth option, but was still planning a hospital birth. 

Shortly after finding a hypno birth class and hiring me as her doula we started talking about more options. She was chatting with me about her fears and concerns. These conversations are the type that I often have with my clients, but Ashley's comments to the normal conversation were slightly different. She mentioned that she had a low pain tolerance, her last birth was hard, she wanted a different experience. She was worried about the out of pocket costs. She was fearful of perineum damage. But even in all that fear she had a twinkle in her eye that was dreamy. I sensed with my doula senses that she wanted more, something safer, something important yet responsible for their families needs. So in one of our normal conversations I asked if she'd ever consider home birth. Not only was the cost a benefit, she could be in control of and face her fears, on her terms. She could become the strong woman no one believed that she was, but that I saw in her from the first meeting. She could stay at home with her food, her family (at the time her youngest wasn't allowed in the hospitals due to the H1N1 scare), and her space. She was surprisingly interested. I later put together a list of highly recommended midwives and asked her to consider doing some interviews to discover on her own the benefits vs. risks and to get back to me.

Not a couple weeks later, Ashley called to tell me that she had decided, for a number of reasons to have, not only a home birth, but a home water birth! She had chosen a midwife and was all ready to go. I was floored, really. I honestly didn't expect that, though I was pleasantly surprised. I had a strong sense that home birth was right for this family. I can't really put that feeling into words. It just felt right. 

Over the next few months, Ashely, Joe, her husband and I got to know each other very well. Out of  personal interest and by their request I joined them at their hypno birth classes. We talked at a minimum once a week at length about their worries, concerns and excitement associated with the upcoming birth. With every concern or fear, I worked in earnest to find the best studies and information to support them the best I could. In other words if I didn't know the latest or best information...I didn't tire until I found it. I was determined to help make this birth the best it could be. It is after all one of the reasons she hired me as her doula.

The months and days passed and before we all knew it the big day was here. She called around 8:30 pm in the evening to report that she felt that these contractions might be the real thing this time. I got goosebumps and awaited her next phone call, which came around 10:00 pm. She said they had remained the same, but weren't going away! She told me to go to bed and that she'd call if anything changed. 7:30 the next morning she called to report her water breaking and consistent contractions. She'd be needing me soon. By 9:30 am she was ready for me and so began our labor journey together. 

I arrived at her house to find her laboring very well. Using her breathing techniques we learned in hypno birth classes. She was dressed in a beautiful outfit and her make-up was done. She was busy about the house, doing dishes, preparing her room for the water tub, and laying out the things we'd be needing later. The birth assistant had arrived a few minutes before me to check in on her. She found Ashley to be making cervical change and progress, but it was felt that her baby was in a posterior position. So we started to work on turning the baby, with position changes, belly lifts and walking around the neighborhood. After a lot of work I tucked her and her husband into bed for some cuddle and nap time. I stayed close by, but gave them their space. 

About an hour later, Ivy, a friend and birth photographer, showed up to capture all the moments. She started snapping pictures right away while also offering a ton of womanly support. The four of us women carried on this way for few hours noticing that contractions hadn't changed and neither had her cervix. BUT happily baby had moved up out of the pelvis and was settling down into the LOA position...right where we wanted her to be. The plateau in her labor was starting to wear on her, understandably. Out of no where, Ashely piped up in between contractions and said, "I could really go for some ice cream." About 15 mins later she returned from her computer with coupons for the four of us at Cold Stone. With that we were off on a mission-a distraction-a treat-a kick in the pants! Which worked like a charm. As we all took our last bites and headed out to the car she had a contraction. But this time something was different. There was a change, it was harder and more intense. The ice cream excursion was just the thing to get things going again. 

We returned to find the tub was still on the hot side but she was ready for it. She climbed in as we poured in buckets of ice to get the temperature just right. Contractions where really rockin' now and she needed me to help keep her focus on the low tones as she sang the birth song so many women before her had sung. The water really helped to dull the pain and give her the rest she needed. As we waited for her body to continue it's work and for her midwife to arrive we took each contraction one at a time. Birth was creeping ever closer with each surge of labor. As the family and midwifes started to arrive, Ashley's labor intensified yet again. Upon an exam it was discovered she was very close, but a bulging bag of water was holding her back. Upon Ashley's request her midwife released her water and three contractions later she was letting out the birth roar, that signifies the imminent birth of a baby.  As the midwife reached between her legs she found that the baby's head was crowing. Joe was sitting behind her in the tub and was in the perfect place for catching, which he did as his daughter slide out into his hands. Ashley in all her efforts and hard work of labor, passed out on my shoulder to awake moments later to discover she had just accomplished what she herself may have found impossible a few months earlier. An exam toward the end of the third phase of labor (delivering the placenta) revealed that Ashely had accomplished her goal of an intact perineum. Her sweet Cali, was nursing and she was tucked into bed with her beautiful family. 

To see Ashley now, is to see her in a whole new light. She is not the same fearful lady I meet months ago. She can proudly walk among the many thousands of women that have found the strength and transformation that comes with facing her fears, embracing her body's abilities, and ultimately discovering her newness as a mom and a woman. I was so blessed to be a participant in her birth and to watch her transformation happen right before me. It is in this growth that I find the most joy in my career. Wether the birth be at home, the birth center, or in a hospital-I desire that all my clients will find a part of this transformation. No matter what birth looks like. You could be first time parents as you are welcomed to a new chapter in your life. You could be parents of one or many welcoming the newest member of your family either finding healing from previous experience or celebrating yet again your accomplishments in birth.  Peace and Blessings as you consider your own transformation in birth- that has been or that will be. 

~Jessica