Buca di Beppo Italian Restaurant

If you're in the mood to stuff your face with piles and piles of not particularly great food, Buca is your place. It's loud, fun (if you like loud) and always busy. The food is, well, average. Grocery store deli counter average. Shopping mall food court average. They should hand out pheasant feathers as you leave average. We started with a Caesar salad. Not an anchovy or a hint of egg or garlic to be found. Just a bowl of lettuce tossed with a bland, commercial dressing and covered with some sort of parmesan-like cheese. If you can't get a Caesar right, things aren't looking good for the rest of the meal. The Bruschetta was a greasy, uninteresting mess, and the first of the dishes to arrive with Buca's signature shredded basil garnish (I'm fairly certain this is created using one of those crosscut paper shredders you can buy at most office supplies). The Caprese was horrible, but it's wintertime so we knew what we were getting into. It's my suspicion Buca's summer Caprese is about the same. The Ravioli Al Pomodoro featured a huge pile of slightly overcooked ravioli covered with a bland, uninspired marinara. (Why marinara and not pomodoro? That's the way Buca rocks it, baby.) Next was the Gnocchi Al Telefono. A huge pile of chewy little gnocchi, covered in a vague, slightly sweet cream sauce and garnished with more basil from the paper shredder. The Linguine Frutti di Mare was the best dish we had, with a huge pile of slightly overcooked pasta, covered in clams, grease, garlic, more grease, shrimp and calamari, more grease and surrounded by mussels. And did I mention grease? All in all, an extremely huge pile of very, very average food. And it comes with screaming. Lots of screaming. Birthday people having more fun than you can possibly imagine and screaming like drunken fratboys. Fun.

Chef Marco White once said, ""We're in the business of selling fun, a night out. Food and wine are just a byproduct."" Believe the chef. Buca is proof.

The last two times we've been there, we've had poor service. One wait staff smelled like a brewery. The next time, when the waitress asked for our drink orders and my wife didn't order booze, she asked ""why not?"" For any number of reasons, this question is completely inapporopriate.

I have been to two different Buca's a total of three times. The food was nothing special. They do handle large groups. In fact, that is why I will not go back. Too loud, too spotty on service.